Scratch Cooking November 22nd

Friday I had a very fun lunch with someone that I know through business and have become friends with over our shared love of food and cooking, and ongoing attempts to find balance in our lives. We talked about how challenging it can be to be honest with ourselves and others that our kids come first. And what it means to not be defined by your work.

I thought about that a lot over the weekend. The idea of balance and how we define ourselves. Tonight I went to a meditation at the Buddhist center and it was actually a death meditation. I am way paraphrasing here, but essentially the idea is this; you recognize that you are going to die, that you don't know when you are going to die and that this could be your last day. And then you ask yourself if this were your last day, would you be doing what you are doing? I don't mean work or not work, but if it were your last day, would you waste time getting irritated with the traffic? Would you yell at your children? Would you put work before your family? Would you stress over the demanding client? Would you fight with your boss? Would you worry about the wrinkles on your face or the circumference of your thighs? Would you be keeping score with your friends, your family, your colleagues? It's an interesting way to get a reality check when you find yourself in anger or frustration.

Even before the death meditation tonight, I was in the kitchen cooking and wondering about choosing to spend my time this way. Is this crazy? My weekends are a mad dash of kneading and stirring and whipping and simmering. This weekend it was bagels, buttermilk, creme fraiche, candied ginger, pear and blue cheese souffle, steamed clams, frozen maple mousse and almond and hazelnut praline (which didn't praline as it was supposed to but still worked out just fine as a topping for the mousse). I also bought a book on cheese making. Seriously, it's just the two of us in the house. It seems a little nuts.

Here's what I know, though. When I'm cooking, I'm not ruminating about what's right or wrong with my life. I'm not thinking about what I do or don't have. I'm in the moment. And if it takes all that kneading and whipping and chopping and sauteeing to get me there, so be it. Let's call it the cooking meditation.

Here's what else I know. I am more likely to invite friends over for dinner and my daughter and I are more likely to sit down and chat over dinner when it just took me 2 hours to prepare it, and when she comes home to find homemade bagels or croissants or mousse, she is really, truly grateful.

Sooooo, enough philosophizing, onto the food.

The bagels were surprisingly easy to make. I used this recipe. It took about an hour start to finish. they don't look perfect. Next time I would roll them a little tighter and let them rise a bit more before cooking them, but I'm told they taste a lot like, well, a bagel

I also realized that I need to start prepping for the things I am bringing to our thanksgiving dinner; pumpkin pie, creme fraiche, sweet potatoes. The pumpkin pie requires candied ginger, so I made some this weekend. It requires peeling and slicing ginger bringing it to a boil in a pot of water and simmering for 30 minutes. Rinse in cold water and repeat 3 times. Then simmer in 2 cups sugar and 3/4 cup water for 1 hour and 15 minutes. Roll in sugar and let dry on a rack. Right now, it's drying. The pie will also require almond milk because my friend who invited us has an issue with dairy. So I made a few cups of almond milk (soak almonds over night and then pulverize with water - 1 cup almonds to 3 cups water - and strain). I might try to make almond flour out of the leftover almond parts. I have it drying on a sheet right now

My friends are curing their own gravlax so I said I would make creme fraiche. Creme fraiche requires buttermilk, so first I had to make buttermilk. I added 1 tablespoon of white vinegar to 1 cup of milk, stirred and let it stand at room temperarture for 15 minutes until it started to thicken.

To make the creme fraiche, I used the Splendid Table recipe. Heat 2 cups cream with 2 tablespoons buttermilk stirred in. Let sit at room temperature for 24 hours, refrigerate for 24 hours and, creme fraiche!

Sunday dinner was a pear and blue cheese souffle and steamed clams. For the clams, I sauteed a chopped shallot, poured in 3/4 bottle of white wine, a bay leaf, herbs de provence, dried fennel and then added the clams and steamed them.

The souffle was a variation on the pear and bleu de bresse souffle in the Silver Palate Good Times Cookbook. Here's what I changed; I used garfava flour instead of regular flour. I used a smoked blue cheese. I used an extra egg white to make it lighter. I used the brandy, but would recommend leaving it out. It was light and fluffy and the flavor of the blue cheese and pears was yummy.

I made the maple mousse recipe in the Greens cookbook for dessert. It's really simple. Whisk 3 egg yolks with 6 tablespoons maple syrup and a pinch of salt in the top of a double boiler until it turns a tan color and slightly thick. Stir in a teaspoon of lemon rind and cool to room temperature. Whip 1 cup heavy cream to soft peaks. Fold into maple mixture. Put in freezer for about 2 hours.

I made some praline-like topping to go with it but it didn't come out right. I didn't let the sugar cook long enough, so it never hardened. We still ate it on top of the maple mousse and it was tasty, but not the crunch I was hoping to create. I will have to try that one again!

Here's to balance, my dears. May we all be thankful for what we have!